Y’all are or should be pretty familiar with my story and where I am in life currently. If not, go back and check out my past posts. 😉
As I mature I believe more and more in protecting your peace by any means necessary. I have worked damn hard on getting to the space I’m in to allow anyone (and I do mean anyone) tear that down. I don’t care who it is. Nobody tries your gangsta faster and more
frequent then your spouse. Hunnay, for my people looking to be married,👏🏽do 👏🏽 the 👏🏽 leg👏🏽work!!!! Don’t skip steps rushing to the alter so you’re no longer the single one in the group. The best test (in my opinion & experience) is to live together. Before you throw the Bible at me, I look at it like this. You wouldn’t go sign a loan for a car without test driving it, right? It’s the same premise. Marriage is meant to be for life, and just like a car, you are responsible for the up keep and maintenance. I’ll be the first one to tell you, I didn’t support divorce until I got married! This shit will make you question things you never doubted in the past. It’s also very easy to lose yourself and forget who you were before you became a pair. I am here to tell you, (in my version of the New Orleans accent ) beybeh!!! Protect your peace!!! I have also learned, it’s ok to go back to the old you and show a nigga how it can be if things get too out of pocket (pull out that freak ‘em dress if you need too👗) Sometimes you have to play show n tell (minus the tell). Most men are hands on learners. If it becomes to the point where you don’t remember what made you smile, where you were when you were truly happy and who you were with, it’s time to make some changes. Now, before y’all file for a divorce, hear me out. It’s not your partner’s job to make you happy. (this goes for men too) Many people think it’s their partners job to make them happy. You are supposed to come into the relationship whole and happy without the other person. They only add to what’s already there. (I can tell I lost a few amen‘s on that last part). Ladies, if you have daddy issues, he will NEVER be enough until you deal with your trama. Men, she is not your mama, so if you are a mama’s boy who’s expecting her to wait on you hand and foot, that’s not going to fly either (or at least until she wakes tf up, or NOT). I know there’s exceptions to both situation (sadly since people will put up with anything to be in a relationship 😞).
At the end of the day, take care of you. Do what makes you happy, even if it means stepping out of your comfort zone and upsetting the masses. YOLO!!! Heal and deal with YOUR trama; forgive to move on.
(I done went off on a tangent)
Until next week, ✌🏽